Going around in circles

Image via CrunchBase

Here it is.....my big secret. I get lost all the time. No,  not in life.....well, now that I think about it, I do get lost in life at times. However, that's not what I'm admitting right now. STICK TO THE TOPIC, Staci!

I've been bad with directions my entire life. I have no concept of North, South, East, or West. If I take time to "think" about it, I can figure it out. I base it all off of the LIE. It runs East and West, West and East. Wherever I am, I have to think about the LIE to be able to figure out where the hell I'm going.

Sad, but I've made my peace with it. It's also why I rely on my phone's navigation app.

On Friday I had to head to my doctor for my annual physical. It was suppose to be done in December....yeah, I'm a bit behind. Now, I don't go to the doctor all that much. Basically, thanks to my new nutritional way of life, I go once per year.

Do you understand where I'm going with this? Okay, so both kids in the car, the kids had been off all week, and I got off at the wrong exit. I think I was just dazed, and going on auto pilot from back when I worked out East and would get off at a specific exit. Well, that's the exit I got off at, which was ONE EXIT before the correct exit.

When I hit water, I knew I was wrong. So I called the doctor's office, told them I'd be there soon, but I had gotten lost. The girls on the phone became my guide, didn't have to rely on the phone's navigation. As soon as she said the name of the main road the office was on, it clicked "STUPID SHIT, you got off one exit too soon."

But the kids were in the back, shaking their heads, giggling "Mommy, we're lost again, aren't we?"

Any other week, I'd have laughed with them. This week, after a week of Winter Recess from school, they weren't as cute as they normally are. Let's just say, I wasn't giggling with them.

We made it, before my scheduled appointment time. So there.

Well, today, I had to get blood work done, per the doctor's script from the physical I had on Friday. It's a regular thing, keep my cholesterol under constant watch. Normally I go to a lab that's much closer, but the last time I was there, the two girls were so rude, and just STUPID. Yes, STUPID.

I handed the script to them, and they couldn't find the name of the doctor on it. Kept telling me it wasn't on there. I asked for the script back so I could show them where it was, she refused to hand it back to me. And then she refused to allow me to bring my 3 year old son with me into the bathroom to take my urine test.

I wasn't taking a DRUG TEST idiot. I'm not leaving my three year old in the waiting room while I piss into a cup.

I told her to give me back all of my paperwork NOW, and she actually didn't at first, and then I started dialing the main office for the lab, and she quickly handed back everything. When I got it back, I looked at the script and said LOUDLY, "gee, look at that, right there, CIRCLED IN A HIGHLIGHTER is the doctor's name who did the script." Glared at the bonehead, and left with my three year old.

Soooooo, I found a new place. I went to ONE TIME. I thought I remembered how to get there........and yes, I was wrong. I made a left, when I should have made a right.

My son, the always observant boy that he is, looked up after me cursing (YES, I CURSE so much I make people blush, and I love it,) and giggled "We're going around in circles." That's his funny way of telling everyone we're lost.

I laughed. He laughed harder. We came close to having a pee in pants accident in the car. We did not, or this would be a whole different rant.

In any event, I pulled into a parking lot, typed in the address of the lab, and realized at that point, I had made a left, when I should have made a right. But oh, sweet navigation on my Android phone, she got me where I needed to be, ON TIME.

Going around in circles is always super fun, but not when you have an appointment to get to........thank goodness for that navigation on my phone. She's gotten me out of a lot of stupid circles, that's for sure.

In my defense.......which really won't mean much, because I get lost even when I'm totally "together." I did just come off of a two day deep cleanse, and fasting since last night for the blood work to be done. It was also pouring out......

But who am I kidding, none of that mattered, I went left, when I should have gone right. DUMB.